I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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