have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
