What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
