During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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