so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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