absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
He is an equal opportunity slut.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
