that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
two words: eviction party
she pinky promised me she was 18
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Randomize