Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
