i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
