so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Bring me that man meat
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
