I murdered the dance floor call the cops
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize