people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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