Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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