we were pretty classy up until the second keg
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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