My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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