What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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