Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
