real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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