i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
