..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
