i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
