K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
