You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Randomize
