Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
