i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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