Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
