WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
from now on my penis is your penis
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
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