So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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