if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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