the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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