He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
as a side note pls kill me
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize