We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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