I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
