Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
