Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
