It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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