I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
