She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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