don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Randomize
