i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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