I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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