Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
