I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
