He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
