Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
