Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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