I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
