Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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