Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
