Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Randomize
