Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
we're making bets on your personal life
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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